I am best friends with my brothers ex wife and I need advice.

I have been best friends with my brothers ex wife for a number of years. She is very much like a sister to me. My brother is a total deadbeat dad. He owes her tons of child support. I try to stay out of it, but its very difficult. Now, my brother got his 3rd DUI (idiot) and has lost his license. He doesnt want her to know, and does'nt want me to tell her. I feel like I am lying to her. She knows something is going on because he doesnt pick up his girls very much anymore because he isnt supposed to be driving. Another thing that bothers me is that he does sometimes pick them up, but he doesnt have a valid license! I dont know if I should just keep my mouth shut, or tell her. I tried telling him that he has to tell her or I will, but he just gets mad. What would you do?I am best friends with my brothers ex wife and I need advice.
I know your dilemma, being torn between two people you know and care about. And it's hard to choose between being loyal to your brother and being obligated to tell your friend. If I were in your position, I would risk my brother being mad at me and tell his ex wife about his license being revoked, because him driving without one is not only reckless but is endangering his kids. And as they are also her kids she has the right to know. Tough decision, but if something were to happen while he was driving them, the guilt you would feel then would greatly outweigh the guilt of squealing on him. Hope all turns out well - Good Luck!I am best friends with my brothers ex wife and I need advice.
He obviously has alcohol issues and you would be doing him a favor and your nieces to let the ex know that he no longer has his license. You don't need to enable him to be more of an idiot, tell her the truth she has done nothing wrong and deserves to know. Think if it was your children that you were in-trusting him with, would you feel comfortable.



As their mother, she has the right to know if he's driving the kids around illegally. What he's doing is wrong and so what if he gets mad. You tell him he has till such and such a day to tell her or you will. Then follow through with your ';threat.'; He can be mad all he wants, but he needs to put his children's welfare above his own whether he likes it or not.
Ask your brother to come around and have a drink to talk about it...make sure he's driving! Oh yeah and ask his ex to pick him up...'cause he should not be drinking and driving.





Sorry about the sarcasm...the ex wife still talks to you 'cause she has not forgotten your brother. It is her way to keep tabs on him. AS long as these 2 are not involved in a leagal dispute, you can tell her anything or not...Take Care
Hey! You tell her whatever you want. If the truth hurts then he needs to work on the truth. It's not your problem that he is a deadbeat and or an alcoholic. Give me her number, I will tell her myself. You dont have to act or behave on your brothers behalf. It's his life and his problems and he keeps causing them. Tell her, call her now. He cant expect you to be a dog and pony act for his indiscretions.
You should tell. If you believe that your neices %26amp; nephews life are at risk regarding their safety with their father being drunk %26amp; driving without a license, then I would tell its not about him its about the children you are their aunty %26amp; for the kids sake tell the mom your concerns about the safety of your neice %26amp; nephew who also happen to be your bestfriend children.
If it weren't for the kids, I'd say it was none of her business. But I would not allow him to take those kids knowing he has a history of DUI. You need to help her petition the court for him to have supervised visitation only. He should not be allowed to take those children out.





I know this is going to put you in a pickle with your family. But how would you feel if he drove drunk with the kids and they were hurt or, God forbid, killed? You must act on this immediately.



well he is a Deadbeat dad so you have a neice or a nephew you want them in the car with an unlicensed driver , just looking out for the safty of the children i would tell her sure .
I would stay out of it and keep your mouth shut. If you get involved, you will lose one of them. If she asks again, tell her that ';He has to tell you.'; and tell him the same thing
just ask urself...would she tell u if the shoe was on the other foot? how good of a friend are you? how good of a sister are you? how good of a brother is he?
TELL HER if he keeps getting DUIs then he could put the kids in danger and and if he is driving and he gets caught and hauled off to jail that can really hurt them
Because it involves her children, and he has proven to be irresponsible i would tell her.
since you already tried talking to him you should definitely talk to her now because those are her children and it would be very bad if he got pulled over with the kids in the car.
i know you think its wrong but family comes first
It may not help to tell his ex. It might end up ruining your relationship with both of them.


Talk to him again and explain to your brother what the possible complications could be if he is stopped while the kids are in the car with him. Sorry, you already did.





I understand that you are LIKE a sister to his ex wife, but you ARE a sister to your brother. You owe him the opportunity to be the first one to talk to. If he says that you should mind your own business, you tell him that the kids ARE your nieces and nephews and their health and safety is important to you.





It's a tough situation and even though you are friends with this woman, you may not really know all the in's and out's of how the two of them relate. As an analogy- It is amazing what nitro and glycerine do when mixed - even though both seem innocuous on the outside.